Lately, I have had this odd urge to stalk Chelsea Handler, except that I accidentally quit drinking and therefore am not sure how to casually chat her up at the SkyBar bar in West Hollywood.

Perhaps my back-up plan of flashing my #StopTheScalpings sign during a taping of her show on Netflix just might do the trick.

The reason I bring up my disturbed fascination with the scatologically-inclined blonde bombshell is that I just saw some tweets that upset my delicate sensibilities.

Since I believe in returning fire when fired up, here we GO, GIRL:

I mean, it’s not like ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, MSNBC and ALL of the other media outlets, except Fox, escape the protocol cops who censor anything other their limited liberal viewpoints.

I like Chelsea Handler, or at least I used to until she went all bat guano-crazy on politics. She clearly doesn’t know what she is talking about and I don’t think she could vodka up a serious argument otherwise.

Breitbart provided an excellent example of why an elite, multi-millionaire with a liberal guilt complex shouldn’t really, you know, tweet or something.

“I guess one of @realDonaldTrump’s sons is expecting a new baby,” Handler tweeted. “Just what we need. Another person with those jeans. Let’s hope for a girl.”

Handler had apparently attempted to use the word “genes.”

Donald Trump Jr. replied to Handler’s post to correct the mistake, writing: “Jeans??? I guess I’m not at all surprised… but really?!?! #genes”
In all fairness, Handler, the author of “Hello Vodka, it’s me, Chelsea” corrected her use of the word “jeans.”

She explained the misspelling was the result of being a ‘little stoned.’

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